Traveling in my discomfort zone

I have long admired people who can see things artistically in this world. To be able to capture a mood or  a moment and relay that feeling to another is, well, magical.A great-great uncle of mine was Alexander Wyant, a tonalist, whose work hangs in several museums. When I was in junior high school, it was the cool thing to learn to use oil paints in an after school program. I am afraid that one or two of those paintings may survive somewhere in an attic.This week, I entered two photographs in the Westford Regional Art Event, mostly to live in my zone of discomfort. I do not have any illusions of becoming a photographer - one per family is plenty and we actually have two: Adrien and my son Matt.Very few of my own photographs are ones that I would consider worthy of showing to anyone else. Maybe once a year I'll shoot something that I'm actually not embarassed to show. Making a decision to show two photographs was a giant leap outside of the zone in which I am most comfortable. While I don't harbor any illusions of giving up my day job, it was interesting, to say the least, to experience exposing the inner artist, to actually seek the opinion of another on a work so personal.Here are the two photographs that I entered in this years art exhibit (raw files, hence the chomatic abberations on the rope photograph): Living with a photographer has advantages: one is on-demand instruction and advice. Can you spot any of Adrien's recommendations in the composition of these two photographs?

Waiting and Watching

Around 9:00 last night, I got sucked in to watching C-SPAN of all channels. And yes, I was watching the Health Care "Debate" -- if you can call that circus a debate.I am a supporter of national health care and, frankly, I think this particular round of legislation is a pale shadow of what health care should be in the wealthiest industrialized nation on this green earth.  But putting that aside, my great hope is that the minimal protection provided by the Bill will prevent such health insurance financial fiascoes as happened in my family being thrust on another.My suspicions are that this debate was not so much about health care as it was about other changes that some factions -- loud ones as it turns out -- cannot tolerate.  I felt ashamed and mortified that grown adults lobbed disgusting epithets in the direction of Representative Lewis and Representative Frank. What is wrong with us that we can't have a civilized disagreement? That once a vote has been taken, those of the opposing opinion cannot accept what the majority has decided.Last night's vote was mesmerizing. But now there is more to come with the Senate debate. Will there be less acrimony? Doubtful. And what happens from here, no one can know for certain.

March Madness

Does it seem odd to you that all year long, we tell our students to use the word wall or whatever else we have available for students to use in a classroom, but when it comes time to do standardized testing we effectively tell them "just kidding" ?Yesterday, I was giving my students a practice run at what next Wednesday, our first day of MCAS, will be like. Kids are used to asking for help when they need it, or (even better) using a classroom resource when needed. For some, it is a challenge just to read a text in silence. For others it is a shock that, when they ask for help with a word in a text, instead of working through the thought process for strategizing how to decode the word, I say "I'm sorry, but I can't help you at all." Frankly I don't know why I am apologizing.One of my students was stuck on a spelling word yesterday.  Of course if helping students decode challenging vocabulary in a text is outlawed, helping them with spelling is definitely out. He did exactly as he has been taught to do - he went to his personal word wall folder to look for it.  And when I told him he couldn't use that word wall? He shut down. Completely. From that point on he wanted no part of the whole business - I'm hoping I can cajole him back into positive thinking before next Wednesday. This student, by the way, is one of my most accomplished readers and writers.So I have to ask, why in the name of all thing holy are we preventing students from using the tools that they are accustomed to using? What are we telling them - give it up, there's no way you can be successful?As adults, if we don't know something from memory, don't we look it up?  Can't we allow students to do what an adult out in the work world would do?

Ed Reform and Failure

Personally, I'd give most Ed Reform a failing grade. I'm certain that someone reading this is thinking that's a no-brainer because I'm a teacher (and a union member). But that is not why I think reform is failing students.That's right, I said Ed Reform is failing students - not taxpayers, although taxpayers hold a certain stake in successful schools as do real estate agents.As a teacher in a school where many of my students are not successful when the state assessment tools - standardized MCAS and/or MEPA testing - are applied, I am somewhat familiar with "reform". Lately, most of the talk about reforming schools is that the teachers are incompetent or effective. I am not a statistician, but I am sure that given a group of educators some will be wildly competent, some will be competent, and some will be incompetent. The reasons why are complicated. Afterall, we are not working with widgets; we are working with humans - and humans will have human issues that are not necessarily black or white.Now I'm not vain enough to think I have all the answers - or many times even an answer to critics who see my students are under performing. I am open to ideas and I don't mentally toss out ideas without giving them a trial. I listen when someone thinks outside the educational box because I know I my belief system may sometimes cloud perception.Lately what I've seen is some underfunded or unfunded mandate requiring one thing or another. Anyone here familiar with Reading First? I've been through so many different reform models that claim to be the answer to all my prayers, I can no longer keep them all straight. Honestly, does anyone really think one-size-fits-all programmed education will work for every student? Seriously?What bothers me is know-it-all "reformers" who haven't set foot in a public school classroom since high school graduation. They don't have a grasp of the problem, but they do have a solution. Usually one that involves lots of cash being sent in their direction.In order to analyze what is wrong, shouldn't you actually know what the conditions or problem might be?Wouldn't it be productive to know what is already in place?So, to those who dare, you are extended an open invitation to my classroom. Come and see what is going on. Don't make an appointment - just show up at the office and get a visitor's badge. Someone can direct you to Room 207. And after you've looked at what is going on, after you've observed what my students have, need, and wish for, then let's have a conversation about your ideas.

Art Appreciation

My husband, Adrien, is a photographer. He actually has been a photographer for most of his life, having started out in high school, but was sidetracked by a career in music and in software.  A couple of years ago, he started renting studio space in a revitalized textile mill building in Lowell, MA, Western Avenue Studios, and has been building his photography business ever since.If you've never had a career in the arts, it is quite different from the 9 to 5 corporate world. First of all, as I am always fond of pointing out, unlike my career, you can use the bathroom whenever you want :-) Just kidding, Adrien!What really takes some perseverance is staying focused throughout the cyclical nature of getting commissions and jobs. For example, from the week before Christmas through some time in  late January, not many corporations are interested in scheduling corporate head shot appointments. This creates some down time, which allows Adrien to think about self assignments: photography projects that he works on to develop as a photographer and as an artist.In addition to working on a portfolio for an upcoming show at the Loading Dock Gallery in Lowell next November, Adrien has been working with a friend of his, Melissa, to create a video of what happens during a professional photo shoot. Here is a link to the stop-action video he created called 396 Square Feet. I think you'll find it amazing.

Sometimes You Must Do What Is Required

This morning, Al Gore, had a fine Op-Ed piece on global warming published in the NY Times. Global warming has taken a hit recently because of some errors -- minor ones -- made by scientists who study such things. Despite the errors, the consensus, according to Gore, remains unchanged: Global warming is our legacy to our children, grandchildren and beyond.Every time I've visited a country outside of the United States, I've been blown away by the public transportation options available. On our last trip to Europe, Adrien and I spent 3 weeks traveling from London to Brussels/Bruges to several regions of France (Strassbourg, Reims, Beaune, Lyon, and Paris). We used public transportation the entire 3 weeks with the exception of our flights in and out of London.We did not ONCE use a car, nor did we have the need to do so: rail service - whether it was between countries or within the city - was convenient, affordable, accessible.  The high-speed train service from Lyon to Paris (TGV speeds reach 200 mph), Eurostar, Thalys were all more comfortable and less hassle than air travel in the US. No need to use an automobile, public transportation was plentiful. If the trains can regularly get to the small towns in Burgandy, why can't we get decent train service here in the Northeast?However, what I really am thinking about is the ending quote Gore writes in his OpEd which was attributed to Winston Churchill:

“Sometimes doing your best is not good enough. Sometimes, you must do what is required.”

What is required of all of us now? We seem to know, but are unwilling to let go of old ways of doing things. The days of changing your own motor oil and dumping the used black sludge behind the garage are long over. The joking about our Northeast snowfalls aside, this is the real thing.  The signs of Global warming are all around us and we must heed them.

If you don't like New England's weather wait a minute....

or a day, or a week.  We've been experiencing the ugliest winter weather in a while lately.  Off and on snow showers. Snow in some locations and the next town over will have rain. Torrential rains, destructive winds, shoveling and sanding. Grey, cloud filled skies. I don't remember the last day that I actually saw the sun.If I may be so bold as to speak for many, we are sick to death of it.  Ground Hog, damn you, we want spring and we want it now.

Everyday Lives of Students

Monday was our first day back from Winter Break -- I suspect this is only a New England school vacation as I never experienced it growing up in northern Ohio.  A week-long escape is a welcome respite from the stresses of teaching - and yes, I am aware that I chose this profession - but it also serves to highlight the stress of teaching students in urban education.Our Monday morning meeting brought forward three stories from my 8- and 9-year old students. Stories that are told in such a conversational way that they seem as normal as a visit to grandma's. Again, Ruth Payne's fine chronicle of trauma and poverty, A Framework for Understanding Poverty, helps me to see the events outside of my middle-class white Leave It To Beaver upbringing. For these children, life is what it is.Story number 1: "my cousin was arrested with his pit bull." Now sometimes "arrested" takes on a rather broad definition in the mind of an 8-year old. In this case it was true; I verified it by reading the local newspaper online after school: the cousin had been taken into custody after allowing his unleashed and unrestrained pit bull to lunge at people walking in the downtown area, had refused the request of a police officer to leash the dog, and resisted arrest.Story number 2: brother - who the student had recently revealed was in jail - was rearrested.  This student reported on the event as if it were an everyday normal occurrence." Had I seen X's name in the paper? He's going to jail."Story number 3: a tenant living in the same apartment complex as my third student triggered the SWAT team to swarm the building after said tenant threatened a cab driver with a gun. The student had lots of details and had obviously seen most of the confrontation - her details matched the newspaper article too.Now several things come to mind here.  First of all, the traumatic distractions in these students' every day life are unbelievable. Secondly, yes school is a "safe place" and expectations for what happens in school remain high. But the distractions and worries these children must overcome to even be close to ready to focus and concentrate are, most of the time, unimaginable.This is what stresses out urban teachers.  We come to know the human story, the reality these children deal with.

Time Travels Revisited

For some reason I am fascinated with history - family history. And during school vacations, when I finally have some time to spend on such endeavors, I am able to do quite a bit of research. Not exactly as exciting as skiing or snowboarding or as relaxing as sitting on a beach or by a pool, but something different to occupy my mind.This week I came across an obituary - a scrap of newspaper folded neatly into my great, great grandmother's autograph book. The obituary was for her father, James Cuthbertson Sharron. JC as he is referred to in my family (his father was James Russell Sharron), was a minister's son who himself became a minister in the Presbyterian church. His life's travels took him from Dauphin County, PA where he was born in 1810 to Jefferson College and Princeton University, then to a posting in Muskingum, Ohio around 1835. In the 1840s he moved to Iowa, before Iowa became a state. Here he moved from pioneer town to pioneer town, organizing churches in West Point and Birmingham as well as some smaller town. In the 1860s -- at the ripe old age of 50-something -- JC joined an Iowa regiment as a chaplain for the Union Army. After the Civil War, he returned to Iowa and to his ministry, dying in 1868.Now why is all of this interesting? For some reason the connections to the ancestors who make up my family history, make the dusty stories and facts that were taught to me more real. 1810, before the War of 1812.... how odd that one of "my people" went to college (twice)! 1830 was when Ohio achieved statehood - JC was in Ohio shortly after that. And yet, Ohio was too settled for him so he moved on to Iowa when the population of that territory was 50,000. The Civil War - 1865 - this ancestor lived through it.Granted that JC had a more interesting life than most of the ancestors I have uncovered. In fact for whatever reason, his story is the most complete of my ancestors' stories. Reading through my great great grandmother's autograph book reveals some of the threads of an everyday life -- the sadness of having to move to a new town, illness or deaths of friends and acquaintances, the chronicle of a plains pioneer.I am at once awed by the strength of character of these people and maybe, just maybe, beginning to understand the challenges of living in another time in history.

In Need of an Educational Time-Out

School vacation week in Massachusetts started for me as of 2:50 yesterday afternoon.I know there are some in the private sector who will read that statement and disparage me. But here is why I not only need this vacation, I deserve it.1.  I am not paid for the days off. Contrary to popular opinion, teachers are paid to work a number of days per contract period.  No one is counting next Monday through Friday in the day count.  Hence, working the requisite 180 (actually it's 181 in Lowell) days means we stop the clock on Monday at Day 106. The daily count will begin again on Monday February 22.  So you see, taxpayers, you are not paying for my days off. My official work year (more of that word "official" later) will end whenever we hit 180 days.2.  Since we returned to school on January 4, I have put in 10 hour days 5 or more days a week. It takes planning and preparation to engage children in learning. What it takes for me is 4 hours daily on top of the time I am with the students. That's not poor time management people.  That's the amount of time it takes to correct and analyze assessments, reset education goals - sometimes for each student, find resources to meet those needs, and then write the whole mess down using Language and Content objectives as required by my District.3. Official work week of course in not any where close to the hours spent with students. "Officially", I am not working during the summer. I am definitely not getting paid. In reality, I am taking courses that not only update my professional understandings but help me acquire the needed Professional Development Point to be relicensed every 5 years. And no, you can't get PDPs for sitting by the pool or mowing the lawn.  It takes about a week after the students leave to close out required paperwork. It also takes time to gear up for a new school year -- I stopped counting last August after I'd spent 40 hours. It was too depressing.4. The amount of paperwork, testing, reporting, etc. in any given time period during an academic year would bury most anyone I know. Every year there seems to be more of it.  And I'm a classroom teacher - imagine the Special Education people who have legal documents to fill out! I'm pretty adept with a computer having worked with them since 1977 (no that's not a typo). Even Excel can't bail me out of time-sucking reports and data analysis.I am exhausted and slept a record 10 hours last night. I'll probably take a nap today. Maybe by Wednesday I'll feel like a human again. And on Monday, I hope to meet my students with some renewed energy and the ability to pull of another round of 10 hour days.

Reality Bites

Over the last weeks, my hometown has had two incredibly sad instances of domestic violence. Working in an urban setting, teachers are always aware of the nasty underbelly of society. Certainly I have had students who have been impacted by domestic violence, but that was in the city. Not in my neat little suburban, monied hometown.In the first instance, a man shot his wife during an argument and then turned the gun on himself. The woman lingered for a day and then died. At least two high school age children were at home at the time of the shooting and a third arrived home shortly after. Now three children are without a mother or a father, who is in custody pending trial.Last week, a father shot and killed his 17 year old high school senior daughter, shot his wife, and then committed suicide by turning the gun on himself. By all accounts, this girl had a wonderfully bright future ahead of her; she had just been accepted to UVM. While the reasons for the shootings have not fully been revealed, the reality is that they happened. And they happened right here in the cozy suburbs.No one seems to have seen this coming. There had been a 911 call hangup and, following protocol, the dispatcher called the home back. The daughter indicated that all was okay and no police assistance needed. However, even as the dispatcher was talking with the daughter on the telephone, her father began using his gun on the family. Another family is destroyed by violence.Even though I did not know this family, or the other family affected by domestic violence, I feel an overwhelming sadness. Sadness for the families who must try to pick up the threads of their lives and continue to live. Sadness for a mother who, if she regains cognition and awareness, will now live with unimaginable grief, sadness for classmates who have lost a great friend to senseless violence.Such incredible sadness to this story and the story of  the other family in town destroyed within the last two weeks by violence. And it happened here in the safe, secure, suburbs. Were there warning signals that weren't picked up because of our affluence?Domestic violence is all around us. Lulling ourselves into feeling complacent because of affluence is no longer an option.

100 Days

Yesterday, we reached the 100th day of school -- triple digits.  From this point on the year will whiz by at the speed of light... 80 school days from now we will be all done. For kids, that seems like an eternity, but for me Day 100 is the point at which panic sets in.In Massachusetts - and in most of northern New England - we have a school vacation week coming up beginning next week. Originally put into the academic calendar to accommodate the ski areas, it morphed into a week of "energy savings" in some districts. No students = low(er) energy costs for buildings. I'm not certain I buy into that one. It seems like teachers and custodial staff both show up for chunks of time during "vacation" weeks to catch up.After the vacation week, my third graders will be subjected to a battery of tests that rival the National Teachers' Exam (remember those?).  First, each ELL will be evaluated for language acquisition using the MELA-O (more of an observation really), then they will take the more formal MEPA test. The District Math benchmarks are opening up on the Monday after vacation and all students will take those tests. Then there will be end-of-term assessments in the classroom, and last - but certainly not the least - we have the MCAS Reading Test, my students' first foray into state-wide testing.  Just thinking about all the testing is making my head explode - imagine what it must be like for a 9 year old.But wait, that's not all. We have another round of testing in May (MCAS for mathematics) and more required assessment.  After we hit the math MCAS, we're on to end-of-year activities - field days, final field trips, report cards, Team Meetings.... yikes!So for me, Day 100, while a milestone in our academic year, is the start of stress season. Heaven help us all!

Connections

Periodically, I go on a genealogical rampage trying to find -- and understand -- my family history.  For me, it's always been slow going and each find is in itself a victory.  My people liked to hide under rocks.On one  side of my family, the Wyants and Lees (not of Virginia, but of Kentucky),  my great-great grandmother, Sophronia Lee Wyant, was born in 1836 (or 1830 if you ignore her changing of birth years in the Lee Family Bible). Sophronia Lee Wyant, the daughter of a Kentucky physician, was the wife of a Methodist minister in the Ohio River valley. Born in Indiana, Sophronia lived in Ohio, Kentucky, Indiana again, and finally Illinois. As I read aloud Little House on the Prairie with my third graders, I realized that Sophronia's life coincided nearly exactly with Pa Ingalls' life.  How strange!I recently finished Chasing Lincoln's Killer by James Swanson. As I read this text, I couldn't help but wonder at how my relatives must have reacted to this event in America's history.  My g-g grandmother would have been a pastor's wife in Crittenden, Kentucky at the time of Lincoln's death - she would have been in confinement as my great grandfather Wyant was born in Cittenden in May 1865. At that time in her life, she would have been 3 years away from widowhood; my great-great Grandfather William Orrin Wyant became ill suddenly and died in January 1868.  Sophronia Lee Wyant kept a scrapbook of newspaper clippings which we have in our family. Would she have clipped out anything to reveal her feelings as Lincoln's funeral procession made its way from Washington back of Springfield, IL?I wonder about my family ancestry and how they would have reacted to events of the day. As time passes, our history veils events in romanticism, often ignoring the difficulties of every day life. Reactions and opinions contrary to popular beliefs often are glossed over with cursory attention.All of which leads me to wonder more. How will my future relatives view our time in history?

Worry About The Quiet Ones

As with every year, there are always kids that are easy to read and those that are "question marks".It amazes me when kids are remarkably accepting of situations beyond their control. One of my students this year is a quiet unassuming kid. He struggles with some academics but works very hard. About a month ago, this student told me he would be moving to New York. That was a big disappointment because he is a pleasure to have in our class community; I joked with him that he couldn't go and that I'd stand in front of the moving truck so he couldn't leave us.  A few days later he quietly reported that his Dad told him he could stay, he wasn't moving after all.Now that should have perhaps set off some alarm bell, but it did not. Life moved on. At the beginning of last week, he was absent for several days in a row and I worried that he may have moved away after all. But he returned and very quietly, without much emotion, revealed that his Mom had moved out of the house. We talked about that and whether he wanted or needed to talk with a counselor. Being a quiet student, he shook his head no. We moved on, his demeanor didn't change one bit despite an upheaval that had to be upsetting.Today, during a school assembly in which our fourth graders, our "seniors", presented their annual play, my quiet student was sitting behind me. A casual comment, that next year I'd be watching my third graders perform as fourth graders, brought an unusally revealing response: Mrs. Bisson, my parents won't be here to watch me. My Dad works. My brother's in jail. My Mom left us.Here was this quiet stoic child looking at his future and knowing he wouldn't experience it in the same way as most of  his peers. This four-sentence glimpse into his life, into what influences his being burned in my brain.It is the quiet student that I worry about the most.

Healthcare and Tuesday's Election

Massachusetts will have a special election on Tuesday in order to fill the remaining term of Senator Kennedy.  The two contenders, Martha Coakley and Scott Brown are attracting state-wide attention and even the national media has an eye on this thing. An election on a January Tuesday in the middle of -- and I write this as a storm is dumping up to 6 inches of heavy wetness on us -- Snow Season seems ill-advised, doesn't it? Timing is everything.The successful Senate candidate will, of course, be able to vote on the Health Care bill before Congress. I'm certain it won't surprise anyone who knows me that being somewhat left of center; I don't consider this current bill enough of a reform of the debacle that is the US healthcare system. But it is something.In my opinion, one of the most desperately needed provision of the bill being considered is the part that will not allow insurance coverage to be denied based on prior conditions or catastrophic illness. Most people in Massachusetts will not remember the time when our Commonwealth did not protect people from having their insurance denied or from pre-existing condition clauses. I do.Nearly twenty years ago, I underwent surgery and chemotherapy for breast cancer. Thanks to my spouse's excellent health insurance -- an HMO by the way-- there was not one problem for me as far as insurance coverage. A treatment plan was recommended and I received it. At the time, I did not have my own insurance coverage because I worked for a parochial school. Needless to say, benefits in a parochial school are not on a par with those offered to corporate employees.Some years later, my husband wanted to change employers. The new employer offered a different, more traditional insurance only -- and I would be denied coverage due to my pre-existing condition.  Luckily even in the 90s there had been some healthcare reform, and I was able to continue my original coverage through COBRA.  But, what was once free and included in our family premium, would now need to be paid for separately for 12 months until I could prove myself "worthy" of coverage.  I would still need to be part of the new employer's healthcare plan (in case something new and unrelated to the cancer came up), but I could not receive coverage for any treatments that could be connected to my prior diagnosis of cancer.  I can still remember the cost per month of the continued COBRA insurance: $237.  Not a non-trival expense for a family.The fear of losing healthcare coverage was one of the biggest stress outcomes of my illness. I did not worry about the actual treatment or the possibility of recurrence so much as bankrupting my family and all that we had worked toward should my treatment cause the insurance to lapse and coverage to be denied.  No one should have to endure this worry on top of fighting through a major illness, but outside of Massachusetts, many people do.I am lucky enough to live in a state where I have protection from insurance coverage roulette.  Most states do not have laws on their books that prevent insurance companies from denying coverage based on pre-existing conditions. The US Healthcare Reform legislation will not greatly impact me at all, but it will improve things for people who live in other states where such protections are nonexistent.And our two candidates for Senate? Martha Coakley has clearly supported the US bill and the other, Scott Brown,  is hoping to become the person to prevent its passage.The importance of this vote is that the successful candidate will have an impact on quality of life for many, many people. Tuesday's Special Election vote will make a difference. Vote!

The Power of our Words

Each year I've required students to write at least weekly about something they have been reading.  At first the students' letters go something like this:

Dear Mrs. Bisson,I read Arthur's Teacher Trouble. It was really funny.Your friend,

No matter how pushed I am for time I generally manage to write back and so our written conversations sometimes morph into writings that are less about reading and more about what is going on in a student's life.  However, as the school year progresses, I do get the students to write a bit more insightfully -- or at least to offer some support to their reading opinions.  When the changeover happens, it is a proud moment for me: my students are arriving as readers and writers.Last week one of my students wrote an outstanding critique of a book she had been reading and she wrote reasons for the character's behavioral changes throughout the book. In my reply, I happened to mention how proud I was of the student's response -- and wrote those exact words to her. It was purely serendipitous that I expressed this idea; the student is quite bright and surely must have heard accolades previously.The student's reply to me today points to the power of our words -- the student circled the words "I am so proud of your thinking" and then highlighted those words with exclamation marks. In her reply, my student revealed that no one had ever told her this before.  She revealed that the words made her feel good about herself.I have no way of knowing how this tiny moment in my student's academic life may influence her, but I am hopeful that she will continue to build her self esteem and positive learning attitude well beyond the 180 days she spends with me in our classroom community.Once again, I am struck by how powerful and influential a teacher's words can be on students.  This time the comments were by chance; in the future I hope to make such powerful words  more intentional.

The Rich Get Richer.....

and the poor keep getting poorer.  Today's rant comes courtesy of Scholastic, that megaconglomerate of student book publishing.Having just submitted a book order for my class (a rarity), I am struck by the advantages of working in a more middle-class socio economic school district.  Yes, it is true no one is holding a gun to my head to teach in an urban school district where family finances are not so flush. Scholastic's website is currently promoting online ordering for parents. Now that is indeed wonderful and saves the teacher (no parent volunteers) the work of balancing out an order before submitting it.  I certainly don't fault the more affluent the advantages of ordering online, but I do find the promotion from Scholastic -- get a free classroom book for every submitted online order -- a bit of a slap. The downside for a teacher who works with a disadvantaged population should be clear:  parents without computers/internet connectivity (and there are many here) can't do this.  No online orders means no free books for a classroom that could dearly use them. Teachers like me, working in an urban environments where much of the classroom literacy library comes from the teacher's own finances, cannot take advantage of such a perk.  This aggravates me.As I checked out of my Scholastic order, I noticed another banner promotion from Scholastic: schoolstop.com.  Apparently through this website, teachers can post a list of supplies for a classroom and parents can choose to fulfill the list. And, for every fulfillment on the list, a teacher will receive more Scholastic Book Club Bonus Points (used for more free books and materials).  Sounds great, doesn't it? In a school district where my 2009-2010 supply budget was cut by 25% this year -- and finances don't look good for next year, getting donations from parents to cover the gap in the supply budget would be great -- in fact getting a box of tissues would be super. However, parents who are struggling to keep food on the table and the rent up to date, are probably not in the frame of mind to donate supplies to their child's classroom. Once again, my counterparts in more affluent communities get advantages that I can only wish for.Yes, I know that there are other donation sites -- and I'm already all over them. I just wish Scholastic with their monopoly and ensuing great big profits, might have had a little less of a middle-class mindset when promoting freebies for teachers -- because many teachers will not be able to take advantage of these freebies.  Believe me, I would greatly have appreciated more books for my class library and needed supplies that don't come out of my personal funds.Most of the time, I don't get so irritated at the advantage-disadvantage thing. I know life isn't fair. I just wish once in a while that there was a bit of equity between the haves and the have nots.

Hopes and Dreams, Part 2

One of the nicest advantages of teaching is the possibility of multiple "fresh starts" throughout the year. There's the obvious one -- in the Fall, another after one report card period closes and another opens, and tomorrow's: the first day of a new calendar year.Each start brings excitement and butterflies.  Obviously the unknown of meeting students for the first time in the Fall is stressful, but so is a restarted school year after vacation.  Will I be up to the task? What do I need to know about these children to make this a positive experience? How can I adapt and adjust my lessons to stay true to my own pedagogical philosophy yet provide students with what they'll need for the high stakes tests that envelop us in uncertainty and doubt.Tomorrow begins the first school day for 2010. It is a time for restarting learning with even greater intensity, with renewed commitment to our learning mantra:

• This is important,
• You can do,
• I am not giving up on you.

And what I'd like....

Recently the Boston Globe ran an editorial in support of gift limits for teachers.  I can't relate.First of all, working in a high poverty, urban school district, I don't have the experience of parents buying outlandish gifts at the holidays for junior's teacher.  Sorry. It's all my families can do to put food on the table and pay their rent.  The thought of a parent purchasing a spa card for me just is not on my radar. I say this without regrets or envy. And honestly, some of the money amounts written about in the Globe editorial ($2,000 is an amount I remember), are outrageous. They may not be intended as such, but it sure seems like a kind of bribery or influence that could get in the way of honest conversations about children and their schooling.I don't need monetary recognition or rewards from parents. Really.  When I worked in a private school, I generally asked parents to donate to a local charity -- if they were so inclined.  I don't really want for anything. And now, as a teacher in a high poverty system, teacher gift-giving puts pressure on any parent who is struggling to make their paycheck last.So here's what's on my "wish" list:I would like our elected officials - those in charge of money allocations for school budgets - to stop short-changing school systems. The budgets are cut to the bone. Less is more is getting just a bit tired.  In my world, less just means I fund what supplies are needed from my own pocket. I'm not talking about construction paper for optional art projects here. I'm talking about binders and notebooks and pencils and tissues.  Yesterday a Globe reader wrote a letter citing a amount close to $500 per year paid out of pocket by Minnesota teachers as if it were outrageously high.  Well, that is. But I routinely spend between $100 and $200 a month on my classroom.  You do the math.Secondly, I would like the Globe to stop talking out of both sides of its collective mouth.  You can't trash teachers and the teachers' unions one day and then kiss up that teachers need parent respect in the form of some recognition the next.  Gratitude starts with you, Boston Globe.  Either you respect what teachers do or you don't. Stop whining that teachers are unfair whenever we don't go along with the privatization, whether it's vouchers or Charter Schools, and when we point out that we are not teaching commodities but actual humans who have variations bean counters can't even fathom.And lastly if one really wants to thank me, write a note telling me about something you appreciated.  Better yet, send a copy of the letter to my Principal or Superintendent.  Day in and day out teachers hear all manner of disrespect; after a fashion that takes a toll on even the most confident of educators.  How refreshing and totally appreciated an unsolicited compliment would be!So in the spirit of the holidays, I offer my Christmas wish list.

Why Do You Teach?

This afternoon's email brought a solicitation from the AFT: Why do you teach and what do you and your colleagues need to do the best job for your students?  It is the why of something I have been so passionate about for more than 22 years that is difficult to put into words.Why do I teach? At first I went into teaching because my grandmother, for whom I had been named, had been a teacher in the early 1900s. Having never known my grandmother, who died when my Dad was 9, I was of course fascinated albeit enamored by the thought of her. So, from the age of 8 -- I remember it distinctly -- I have wanted to be a teacher.I, in fact, left teaching for a while to pursue other more lucrative jobs in business. One layoff too many, and I found myself rethinking my career choice again. This time with a lot more maturity, I bucked the trend of going from education into corporate jobs, studied and obtained my M.Ed.  I became an elementary school teacher.I taught back then and I continue to teach now because in the end, it is a profession that challenges me each and every day. That's the selfishness in me speaking -- I thrive on the challenge of change. In 22 years, I don't believe I've had any two years alike enough to recycle lesson plans with any regularity. Each year is a new invention.  Just as each student I've encountered over the span of my teaching career is different, so must the delivery of instruction be redesigned.  It is the pursuit of making a positive difference in the learning life of a child, the ability to turn a child on to loving reading -- and mathematics -- that moment when my students "get it", that exhilarating high of seeing students grow and approach their own potential that cannot be replicated in any other profession. It doesn't hurt that every once in a while a student calls me "mom" -- most times I take that as a high compliment.I truly believe that it is our societal responsibility to provide all students with an education -- not just a select few, not those who pass an entrance exam.  This is why I choose to teach in urban public education.  It's hard. It's frustrating. It's not often appreciated. And oftentimes what happens is unbelievable. I don't always mean that in a good way.If you've ever read any of Jonathan Kozol's writing, you know and understand that we -- that's the gigantic and collective "we" -- owe our most vulnerable citizens the best education possible.  We owe them the possibility of a better life.  I teach because I wish to be part of that solution, even if it's for just one child.Teaching is something of a religious experience for me. I believe that I am impacting -- positively most of the time -- my students' lives. I am passionate about doing the best I possibly can. That means keeping up research, talking to other educators when I can't figure out how to reach a student, reaching out to parents who may not want to reach back, covering my behind and filling out paperwork. But most of all, it means putting the possibilities of learning out there for students to see, to feel, to experience and to value for themselves.It's more than I ever imagined.