NYT’s columnist Michelle Cottle’s Op-Ed from today (24 November) should be required reading for the adults in the room. I’ve gifted it at the end of this post.
As the Trump Administration targets those workers who are willing to work in elder care, options and the care itself become limited. It will not matter whether an elder enters into assisted living, a nursing home, or attempts to age in place with at-home providers, we will all feel the impact of not enough workers for an ever-growing elderly population.
I worry about this for myself and my husband. We’ve made plans as best we can. But I also worry about this for my mother who currently lives in assisted living.
The concerns we have are about making sure my parents’ hard-earned savings and the proceeds from the sale of their condo cover the costs of living in a safe environment. This keeps me up at night. Two years ago, when my mother, now 102, began falling and needing more assistance with daily tasks, we convinced her to move to assisted living in a nearby town. Calling this suggestion a hard sell would be generous, and there was much resistance. But after multiple falls, Mom’s PCP, a doctor for whom she had a lot of respect, had a serious sit-down and convinced Mom to agree to move from living on her own and independently in a town 60-plus minutes away from me, the closest sibling, to assisted living with 24/7 care options.
This was as rough a transition as one can imagine it might be for someone who has not only lived independently for 100 years, but who also managed my Dad’s care (COPD) until his death 20 years prior.
When Ms. Cottle calls out the Trump Administration’s penchant for going after resident green card holders, she does not hold back and neither should any of us. Many of the caregivers in Mom’s assisted living facility have legal status, but I wonder how many of them are in fear of random arrests and deportations. Who will be willing to do this work?
Caring for elderly is hard work; it’s physically challenging and mentally exhausting. There is the cantankerousness that comes from life not going the way it has always gone before; changes are hard. There’s the loss of independence. There are social changes; suddenly you are eating in a dining room with 50 similarly aged people. Things don’t taste the same and the cooking is almost universally not your style no matter how good (or bad) it might be.
So yes, I have concerns that the people who are willing to fill positions in care-giving facilities are dwindling, even as the need for more facilities, more personnel are exponentially increasing.
And then there is the question of Medicaid. Should my Mom outlive her money, what will happen? At nearly $11,000 per month which is the cost for the least amount of support at this facility, what happens when private funds run out? That worry keeps me up at night. As the Administration makes Medicaid more difficult, as placements in Medicaid eligible facilities become more competitive, what will happen to our vulnerable elders if there is no safety net?
To Michelle Cottle I say, please keep shining a light on these dilemmas. To the rest of us similarly placed, keep speaking up. And to those who have not yet encountered elder care concerns, please read and picture your self similarly situated.
Read this. Read it slowly and thoughtfully. Imagine YOU are the caregiver in this situation. Whether your elderly relative has dementia, serious illness, or other needs. Who will be there to care for our parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, siblings? Who will care for us?
A little louder for the folks in the back: we are all headed in the same direction.
Link to gift article: We Had No Idea What Was Coming: Caring for My Aging Father
After An Educator's Journey 